Busy in Bristow: I'll Take Ordinary Days Over the Holidays

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Is anyone actually sad the holidays are over? Sure, we may experience the occasional twinge of nostalgia, like when we snap the top on the last box of ornaments in mid-January. (I can’t be the only one who stashes them away in quick fashion to pull the tree down and waits until weeks later to face the tangled mess of ornery hooks.) But aside from that little longing that pops up unexpectedly when we realize just how many January days have already passed, I think most of us adults are secretly – or not so secretly – RELIEVED that we made it through another holiday season, relatively (pun intended) unscathed. I mean, there wouldn’t be entire reels of satirical movies making fun of ourselves if this weren’t the case, right?

This past holiday season was particularly difficult for me, as my grandfather passed away on December 10. He’d retired to Tucson long ago and was a native of Illinois, so I was not only saddened by my loss but also challenged with last minute travel plans in the midst of an already too-busy season. Now, I don’t know about your list of “Things You Want To Fit into the Holiday Season While Keeping Up with Your Usual Family/Work Obligations,” but every year my list grows exponentially and becomes more unrealistic. Traveling to the Midwest for Grandpa's funeral and leaving psychic space to grieve meant that certain holiday activities were going to have to go.

Caroling was on the automatic cut list because it wasn’t an already established tradition. Also out the door were the cut-out cookies that the kids eventually made under substitute supervision. And sadly, there were entire boxes of decorations – including the nativity scene – which never even made it down from the attic.

We did what was most important to us. Spent time together as a family, both nuclear and extended. Attended Christmas mass. Opened presents  that Santa left under the tree. Ate and ate and ate. Used the “good china” (a $100.00 box of knockoff Lenox purchased at J.C. Penney two years ago at a post-Christmas bargain of $45.00). Read and watched most of our favorite classics like The Littlest Angel, The Polar Express and Charlie Brown Christmas.

We didn’t use the Advent wreath I’d purchased the year before. We didn’t go ice skating, rocking out to the tunes that you only want to hear between Thanksgiving and the day after Christmas. We didn’t visit all of the friends for whom we bought little gifts, so my closet is still stuffed with tissue paper filled bags that tumble out every time I open the door.

I guess the thing about the holidays is that while you are smack dab in the heart of them, you enjoy them as much as you can, holding on to whatever magic has persisted throughout your families’ traditions. But when life happens (which is sometimes illness and sometimes, death), it has no regard to your religious calendar or society’s seasonal whims. This year, more than any other, I am glad to get back to my regular routine and happy to close the attic door on that last string of garland. I have to admit that most of the time my favorite things aren’t wrapped up in bows. Most days, I prefer the plain brown boxes.

Like many moms, Kathy drives a mini-van full of booster seats and Disney/Pixar DVD’s. When she’s not chauffeuring her kids, ages 10 and under, to school and activities, she teaches for Prince William County Public Schools, writes fiction and poetry, and blogs about the challenges and rewards of being a mom to young children.